"Living After the Loss" part 2
By Ashlie D. West, MSW
Another option is cremation. This allows you further options, including spreading the remains in a selected location, or keeping them with you in an urn. Take the time to select the method that you are most comfortable with, and what best fits your lifestyle.
For example, some people do not have a permanent home or may frequently move. Having the remains cremated will allow those individuals to take their pet with them to future destinations, if that is something that they feel is important; while others may feel better knowing their pet has a final resting place.
Is it silly to have a funeral for my pet?
Absolutely not. Rituals are a very important part of healing. Although different cultures have varying beliefs and values, all cultures have rituals that are important to them. Depending on your own values, beliefs, and comfort level, it may be helpful to have a special way to say goodbye to your pet.
For some, it may be helpful to say a prayer over the remains, while others may simply burn a candle in their pets memory. Whatever you feel most comfortable doing, make sure you give yourself a time to say goodbye.
What do I do now?
As stated before, grieving takes time. Unfortunately, it is not something that will happen overnight. It is a slow process and takes time and work. Over time, however, things will improve, and you will see that you are able to return to your routines and feel a sense of "normalcy".
Here are some things that you can do to help with the grief over time:
Acknowledge emotions as they arise - allow yourself to cry, or talk things through as you need to
Seek out others who will listen
Consider some form of self-expression - journaling, poetry, music, or art
Donate time or money to a charity in your pets honor
Create a scrapbook or album of your pet
Plant a living memorial garden
If you are feeling guilt (which is a normal reaction), force yourself to stop those thoughts, replacing them with positive statements ("I loved my pet, and she/he loved me".).
Remember the good times - share those memories with others, or write them down for yourself.
When you are ready, think about bringing in another member to your family - adopting a rescued ferret is an excellent way to honor you lost pet.
While losing a loved one is difficult, and takes time to overcome, the love and joy of having a furry companion far exceeds the negative.
Take time to remember all the good times, and the moments that were special between you and your pet. For as long as you remember and share your love, your pets memory will live on.
